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EYE-BALL JokeZone – ‘Golf – Everything that is important in life …’

February 5, 2012 Comments off
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EYE-BALL JokeZone – ‘Golf – Everything that is important in life …
Posted 5th Feb ’12
This explains it all … GOLF AND WHAT IT ALL MEANS…
This was sent in by Peter R. … thanks Peter and may the Golfing Gods be with you and your Partners Colin S. – Eric and company …

Smiling

  • Golf can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies obscured by the occasional miracle, followed by a good bottle of beer….
  • Golf ! You hit down to make the ball go up.
  • You swing left and the ball goes right.
  • The lowest score wins, on top of that, the winner buys the drinks.
  • Golf is harder than baseball.
  • In Golf, you have to play your foul balls.
  • If you find you do not mind playing golf in the rain, the snow, even during a hurricane, here’s a valuable tip…your life is in trouble.
  • Golfers who try to make everything perfect before taking the shot rarely make a perfect shot…
  • The term ‘mulligan’ is really a contraction of the phrase ‘maul it again…’
  • A ‘gimme’ can best be defined as an agreement between two golfers…neither of whom can putt very well …
  • An interesting thing about Golf is that no matter how badly you play, it is always possible to get worse.
  • Golf’s a hard game to figure…
  • One day you’ll go out and slice it and shank it, hit into all the traps and miss every green.
  • The next day you go out and for no reason at all you really stink.
  • If your best shots are the practice swing and the ‘gimme putt’, you might wish to reconsider this game …
  • Golf is the only sport where the most feared opponent is you.
  • Golf is like marriage, If you take yourself too seriously it won’t work, and both are expensive…
  • The best wood in most amateurs’ bags is the pencil.

SENIOR’S DAY AT THE COURSE

David Letterman’s Top Ten Reasons Why Golf Is Better Than Sex…

  1. #10… A below par performance is considered damn good.
  2. #09… You can stop in the middle and have a cheeseburger and a couple of beers.
  3. #08… It’s much easier to find the sweet spot.
  4. #07… Foursomes are encouraged.
  5. #06… You can still make money doing it as a senior.
  6. #05… Three times a day is possible.
  7. #04… Your partner doesn’t hire a lawyer if you play with someone else.
  8. #03… If you live in Florida, you can do it almost every day.
  9. #02… You don’t have to cuddle with your partner when you’re finished.
  10. #01… And the NUMBER ONE reason why golf is better than sex…

#01… When your equipment gets old you can replace it!

_______________________________

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  1. Stand Alone Joke – Little Johnny and Sis’
  2. YouTube Post – ‘Charlie Sheen and his Goddesses’ – as real as it gets …
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  4. Stand Alone Joke – The CIA Admission Test
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  10. Stand Alone Joke – A Deserted Island Joke

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SmilingThe EYE-BALL JokeZone Index is an Australian produced site and presents a collection of Australian and International humour alike. You’ll find the content either in Joke format, a Video or YouTube upload, or in some stunningly beautiful Nature and other Worldly images presented in PPS format. You’ll also find some inter-active stuff if you’re so inclined. Bookmark the site and come back often as content is continuously being added and highlighted with “NEW”. Hope you smile a lot – it is about the only thing that keeps this World together … let humour do it for you and be happy !!! If you want to contribute and send content – please use this E-Mail Address: – be sure to include your ‘handle’ or name for accreditation purposes … all messages will be reviewed for suitability – no Porn, explicit violence or abuse please.
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